We all go through tough times with the men in our lives from time to time. Sometimes these relationship problems are long-lasting, other times, they’re short-lived. Sometimes, they’re enough to break up a marriage… yet other times, we come out of them feeling closer to our guy than we ever did before.

Regardless of any circumstance, and no matter how great of a conversationalist you consider yourself to be, don’t you always wonder what really goes through a guy’s mind when he acts a certain way? Wouldn’t you just love to know what prompts certain actions (you know, the ones that make you wanna strangle him at times)?

Well, now you can!

Olicious Life has gathered a panel of our very own resident everyday guys. We’ve got a team of single, engaged, and married men in their 20’s, 30’s, and 40’s who are excitedly awaiting to respond to all of your burning “What’s he thinking?!” questions.

Please send in your questions to Submissions@OliciousLife.com. If you’d like to write to us anonymously, you may do so through here, AnonymousFeedback.com. If you’d like to chat with ladies, instead, stop by our relationship forum!

Editor’s note: OliciousLife.com or any of our authors or affiliates are not responsible for any action or non-action by the individual whose question appears below. Any information posted in this or any other article or post relating to this or any other question submitted to OliciousLife.com or any of its authors or affiliates are for entertainment purposes only. The below advice is not to be construed as legal advice, marriage counseling, or life coaching, and is not intended as such.

I’m Afraid to Fall in Love

Yes, I realize how strange that sounds, but it’s the truth. You see, anytime I’m with someone for a while and begin to feel like I’m falling for him — anytime I feel like I can see a future with a guy, just when we both start to talk about staying together forever and when it seems like we were created for each other, he breaks up with me, out of the blue!

It’s happened a couple of times before, once when I was only 20, the second time when I was 24. Both were long-term relationships that lasted for over a year each time, and in both scenarios, these guys came out of nowhere with “I don’t think I love you anymore,” and leaving me.

Help Save My Current Relationship

Right now, I’m seeing a truly great guy. I love everything about him and really think it has great potential to work in the long term. However I am very afraid of admitting this to myself because of my past issues with guys. I feel like the minute I say to myself that I’m falling in love and that we’re meant to be together, he’ll wait just long enough for me to get used to him, then leave me like the others have!

I don’t know what to do at this point to feel otherwise. Any ideas?

Answer

I’m sorry you’d been going through such trouble in your former relationships. Two long term relationships coming to an end in such a manner can’t be an easy thing for anyone to handle, not even a strong woman who’s usually independent and brave.

When it comes to matters of the heart, I think most of us are nervous. None of us adults who’ve been in other relationships are willing to just “give our hearts away” in an instant, without a tiny bit of trepidation. Men, or women, doesn’t matter much; none us of want to get hurt! So, take comfort in the fact that you are not alone!

Because you have gone through such horrid experience twice, you’ll automatically want to shield your heart and feelings more so than the average person will. It’s only natural!

But you know what? All it takes is time! Time heals all wounds, and if this guy you’re seeing right now is truly a nice guy that’s deserving of your heart, he’ll want to give you the time you need! Express your concerns to him so that he understands how you’re feeling and doesn’t assume that it’s his fault, reassure him that all you need is just some time, and watch his reaction. I bet he’ll be more than understanding — and if he isn’t, he’s just not worth your time to begin with!

A Word of Warning

White I know you’ll come around to feeling “normal,” and happy, and in love again, I feel obligated to give you a warning of sorts. You do realize that EVERY relationship could end tomorrow, right?

No matter how happy you are in your relationship, no matter how in love — things happen that may end it in no time flat. One partner could fall out of love (it could even be you, we’re all human!), a partner could fall in love with someone else, some sort of an accident may happen… death… there are just endless things that could go wrong to end any relationship, despite its blissful state at the time of the occurrence.

This in no way means that it isn’t good for as long as it does last, does it?

I guess I’m trying to say, is that love’s a risk. And it’s one that’s usually worth taking. Everything worthwhile is usually a gamble in one way or another, isn’t it?

Look at life, for instance. Anything could happen at any moment, I could die tomorrow for all I know. And yet, it isn’t stopping me from making plans, or enjoying this watermelon I happen to be eating. I do my best to live each day to its fullest, just so I can go to sleep with no regrets — and if I don’t wake up tomorrow, that’s okay — I will have enjoyed life the best I could while I was still here.

Follow my analogy?

Enjoy your relationship, while you still have it! Protect yourself the best you can, but once that urge to love is there, and you have a good guy to love you back, don’t hold back — give it your all. Love with no regrets.