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This is a discussion on Binge Eating Disorder within the Eating Disorder Discussion forums,----- How do you know when a cheat meal or a cheat day, or just enjoying your food crosses over to ...
How do you know when a cheat meal or a cheat day, or just enjoying your food crosses over to "binging" and being a disorder? I have a hard time being able to tell where that line is.
I think it all boils down to the concept of control. I think it's tough to determine between making a choice to keep eating and not being able to control the eating- binging. Like for me, when I have cheats and I'm eating a ton of shit, I could easily put down the fork and stop eating- I personally don't have a hard time making a choice to stop... I just like to keep eating normally and am making the informed decision to do so Regretfully, most of the time!
I think it will differ too from person to person. Like I think I "binge" in certain situations... i.e. parties where there is just a ton of food on the table. I will keep going back for more even though I feel completely miserable. That is a binge to me. But, if I know I've got something coming up that I will cheat because of, I can think ahead and put a plan in place... then I enjoy myself in moderation. That to me is just a controlled, planned cheat.
To me a cheat meal/day is when you eat whatever you want and its no big deal, you dont care. When I binge...there is no stopping me, I'm in a zone and it doesnt matter how full I am...I'll eat until I am physically ill. I see myself from the outside...telling myself to stop...but I physically CANT...then its followed by depression.
To me a cheat meal/day is when you eat whatever you want and its no big deal, you dont care. When I binge...there is no stopping me, I'm in a zone and it doesnt matter how full I am...I'll eat until I am physically ill. I see myself from the outside...telling myself to stop...but I physically CANT...then its followed by depression.
I agree with Nic . This IS ... or should I say "now trying to be was" me.
Didn't know where else to put this...
had a slight falling off the wagon last night...
not a full out binge..but I was full and still kept going....and going...
there was all the halloween candy in the house and it was like I couldn't say no.
Then at the end of the night I still stood in the kitchen and ate some more.
I judt feel so bad because for weeks I have been in total control.. stopping when I was full, and not even a desire to binge....
uggghhh
starting back at zero again...
Didn't know where else to put this...
had a slight falling off the wagon last night...
not a full out binge..but I was full and still kept going....and going...
there was all the halloween candy in the house and it was like I couldn't say no.
Then at the end of the night I still stood in the kitchen and ate some more.
I judt feel so bad because for weeks I have been in total control.. stopping when I was full, and not even a desire to binge....
uggghhh
starting back at zero again...
NO you are not starting back at zero. Life happens!! Don't make yourself crazy. If you are being honest with us and more importantly yourself about how much you ate... it can be considered a carb up. Don't sweat it or get down. The self ridicule and disappointment would send me into a tailspin. It was just one day not DAYS. Today start fresh.
Please don't worry. Chin up and keep going.
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to fit mom of 4 For This Useful Post:
Didn't know where else to put this...
had a slight falling off the wagon last night...
not a full out binge..but I was full and still kept going....and going...
there was all the halloween candy in the house and it was like I couldn't say no.
Then at the end of the night I still stood in the kitchen and ate some more.
I judt feel so bad because for weeks I have been in total control.. stopping when I was full, and not even a desire to binge....
uggghhh
starting back at zero again...
I did the exact same thing last night...it wasnt an all out binge, but I definitely ate past the point of being full.
You dont have to start at zero...just get back on track starting NOW, thats my plan...one day doesnt ruin all that you've accomplished, its all how you react to the peaks and valleys
These posts really do break my heart but the reason is far different from why you can imagine... The reason is there are so many of us who suffer in silence... We have no place of refuge - except now we do - now we have this one...
I fall down all the time but the best way to recognize a failure is to get back up and start again... To fail is easy, to quit is easy, to let this control you is easy... To get better - to demand better - this is hard... And this separates the women from the girls...
Binge eating is about control as the girls say - Think about the roots of tree - the root that says stop this is basically fried and doesn't work properly... This is the difference in a cheat meal and a binge disorder. For a lot of women with ED the concept of can't have's take a toll and become a binge when we finally tip the scale... It isn't having 5 pieces of candy it is easing the entire 2 pound package... It isn't appetizer, entree, and dessert - it is an entire order of wings, and entire large pizza, and a box of oreos...
When we stop viewing some foods as can and can not have's we can make progress... I am not sure how to do this in most cases but I tell myself if I want I eat it because in reality if I don't let myself I will go WAY into binge and purge all over again... My root is broken... I have to have an alternate fix!!
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to For This Useful Post:
Annie you are 100% correct. The reason I am afraid to eat the foods that I have forbidden, or deemed "bad" is because I am afraid I will spin out and not be able to control myself with them because they have been restricted for so long. Man that sentence was a mouthful! Sorry!
Annie you are 100% correct. The reason I am afraid to eat the foods that I have forbidden, or deemed "bad" is because I am afraid I will spin out and not be able to control myself with them because they have been restricted for so long. Man that sentence was a mouthful! Sorry!
Me too! I'm still trying to learn the art of 'Moderation'
Nic...I think you and I both struggle with this mentality. It provides us with guilt and self-loathing. I don't really cheat. And it's because I feel so uncomfortable eating these foods that I have deemed bad. I have been trying to incorporate some "cheat" foods every once in a while, more for the benefit of my mind than my body, of course. I am rambling.
I also suffer from the mental aspect and tremendous feelings of guilt after having a binge episode. I never ballooned or put on any significant weight due to the binges, as for me I would sub the binge instead of eating right so I was calorie in and calorie out... but mentally I was destroying myself and I was seeing 200lbs in the mirror (it was in my head. I have not gone over 142- 145 since I was pregnant 2 years ago. but that is what my mind saw. )
I have chosen to abstain from these foods until I feel I have some control over my portions... moderation. I am working on that too
Last edited by fit mom of 4; 11-01-2009 at 04:35 PM.
Nic...I think you and I both struggle with this mentality. It provides us with guilt and self-loathing. I don't really cheat. And it's because I feel so uncomfortable eating these foods that I have deemed bad. I have been trying to incorporate some "cheat" foods every once in a while, more for the benefit of my mind than my body, of course. I am rambling.
Its weird, In my head...I KNOW there is nothing wrong with having a slice or two of pizza but yet I CANT just stop it there, it always ends up being more. Even if its not binging exactly, its still eating until I'm uncomfortablely full. I've been having more cheats too and until last night, doing well with them! I guess thats part of what worried me about how much I ate last night...like I'm heading back down a dangerous road.
Haha...I think the babbling is good.
Truth is, sometimes I eat clean, on plan food, just to the point of uncomfortably full. What is with that?!?!??! Is it like my subconscious feels so deprived that I eat and eat to make up for it?
I just don't understand it I guess. I suffer from it, yet I don't fully understand it. Why do I long for that 'so full I could puke' feeling? and why do I chose to eat like I am never going to see these foods again? I really do, I stuffed chocolate in my mouth like it was my last chance forever. But, the foods I chose to stuff myself silly with are availabe EVERYWHERE...at ANYTIME. I could eat them whenever I like, but when I do have a binge it is like we are going into WAR and I have to eat like I am never going to see it again.
I just don't understand why I do this. I don't understand why some girls can just 'say no' to pizza or chocolate and not OBSESS over their decision like they just said no to a million dollars??...wishing that they had just said yes and were tasting chocolate as we speak. Why can some girls have one cookie ( or half! that always boggles my mind!) and be done with it? There is no one cookie for me..cookies don't come in ones.
These questions play over in my head daily. And I have to laugh when people at work tell me I have ' so much self-control'. Ohhh if they only knew....
Quote:
Originally Posted by anniemack
Ahh my lovely women...
These posts really do break my heart but the reason is far different from why you can imagine... The reason is there are so many of us who suffer in silence... We have no place of refuge - except now we do - now we have this one...
I fall down all the time but the best way to recognize a failure is to get back up and start again... To fail is easy, to quit is easy, to let this control you is easy... To get better - to demand better - this is hard... And this separates the women from the girls...
Binge eating is about control as the girls say - Think about the roots of tree - the root that says stop this is basically fried and doesn't work properly... This is the difference in a cheat meal and a binge disorder. For a lot of women with ED the concept of can't have's take a toll and become a binge when we finally tip the scale... It isn't having 5 pieces of candy it is easing the entire 2 pound package... It isn't appetizer, entree, and dessert - it is an entire order of wings, and entire large pizza, and a box of oreos...
When we stop viewing some foods as can and can not have's we can make progress... I am not sure how to do this in most cases but I tell myself if I want I eat it because in reality if I don't let myself I will go WAY into binge and purge all over again... My root is broken... I have to have an alternate fix!!
I just don't understand it I guess. I suffer from it, yet I don't fully understand it. Why do I long for that 'so full I could puke' feeling? and why do I chose to eat like I am never going to see these foods again? I really do, I stuffed chocolate in my mouth like it was my last chance forever. But, the foods I chose to stuff myself silly with are availabe EVERYWHERE...at ANYTIME. I could eat them whenever I like, but when I do have a binge it is like we are going into WAR and I have to eat like I am never going to see it again.
I just don't understand why I do this. I don't understand why some girls can just 'say no' to pizza or chocolate and not OBSESS over their decision like they just said no to a million dollars??...wishing that they had just said yes and were tasting chocolate as we speak. Why can some girls have one cookie ( or half! that always boggles my mind!) and be done with it? There is no one cookie for me..cookies don't come in ones.
These questions play over in my head daily. And I have to laugh when people at work tell me I have ' so much self-control'. Ohhh if they only knew....
I just don't understand it I guess. I suffer from it, yet I don't fully understand it. Why do I long for that 'so full I could puke' feeling? and why do I chose to eat like I am never going to see these foods again? I really do, I stuffed chocolate in my mouth like it was my last chance forever. But, the foods I chose to stuff myself silly with are availabe EVERYWHERE...at ANYTIME. I could eat them whenever I like, but when I do have a binge it is like we are going into WAR and I have to eat like I am never going to see it again.
I just don't understand why I do this. I don't understand why some girls can just 'say no' to pizza or chocolate and not OBSESS over their decision like they just said no to a million dollars??...wishing that they had just said yes and were tasting chocolate as we speak. Why can some girls have one cookie ( or half! that always boggles my mind!) and be done with it? There is no one cookie for me..cookies don't come in ones.
These questions play over in my head daily. And I have to laugh when people at work tell me I have ' so much self-control'. Ohhh if they only knew....
I hear this... don't get me wrong... there are days I utterly want to throw in the towel on the whole recovery thing... I feel better after I purge... It's like a high for me... I feel gross but somewhat calm... and relaxed... it is strange...
You know what doesn't come in ones for me: EVERYTHING... except brussel sprouts cause they are gross little balls of mush - or and green peas
I digress...
The questions playing over and over again my mind:
Why can't I be naturally thin?
Why is there so much cellulite on my thighs?
Why am I not pretty?
Why am I still single?
Why do I workout since I don't look pretty and thin?
These questions - these are the ones playing over and over again in my head everyday. I wake up with self doubt and I go to bed with self doubt. I hate the mirror because I look fat... I have a 26.5" waist and think I look like a 400 pound gorrilla... I look in pictures the way I feel... I feel fat... and sometimes I wonder if there is anything I can do about it and I should just accept my fate of being this way...
I struggle all the time - every day... and most of the time the only person who knows how I really feel - the things I really think - is me - and the reason is because I am scared if I let myself tell people I don't have it all together - that my cheese is falling off my cracker - that I have the white flag up and ready to wave - they will tell me I should...
i hear this... Don't get me wrong... There are days i utterly want to throw in the towel on the whole recovery thing... I feel better after i purge... It's like a high for me... I feel gross but somewhat calm... And relaxed... It is strange...
You know what doesn't come in ones for me: Everything... Except brussel sprouts cause they are gross little balls of mush - or and green peas
i digress...
The questions playing over and over again my mind:
Why can't i be naturally thin?
Why is there so much cellulite on my thighs?
Why am i not pretty?
Why am i still single?
Why do i workout since i don't look pretty and thin?
These questions - these are the ones playing over and over again in my head everyday. I wake up with self doubt and i go to bed with self doubt. I hate the mirror because i look fat... I have a 26.5" waist and think i look like a 400 pound gorrilla... I look in pictures the way i feel... I feel fat... And sometimes i wonder if there is anything i can do about it and i should just accept my fate of being this way...
I struggle all the time - every day... And most of the time the only person who knows how i really feel - the things i really think - is me - and the reason is because i am scared if i let myself tell people i don't have it all together - that my cheese is falling off my cracker - that i have the white flag up and ready to wave - they will tell me i should...
Binge Eating Disorder
Regretfully, most of the time!
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