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This is a discussion on Starting over within the You're Not Alone! forums,----- Hi everyone,
its been a long long time it feels. I have missed so much, been under a very dark ...
Hi everyone,
its been a long long time it feels. I have missed so much, been under a very dark cloud it seems. I am ready to get out. I have not been doing much in terms of exercise or eating. Its been whatever and well my body totally shows it. I am at my highest weight ever in my life.
I want to get back to it, back to myself. I need everyones help.
I have to find a balance, so that if I do go out and have dinner I dont feel like a complete failure, so that if my family wants to go out, I dont stay home and isolate myself from everyone.
I was very close to my goal but so lonely at times. Isolated myself from everyone just so I could keep my goal and in the end I felt alone and then gave up. This is not healthy, the all or nothing attitude.
I know I am going on here....but Im just expressing my thoughts. The ones I keep thinking off...
Anyway, would love some feedback, some help, direction...I need to start over and with a plan. I feel like everything is a blurr now.
Hey Trish...good to see you back! I have those same all or nothing struggles and I'm working so hard at finding that balance...I'll be here to support you along the way
You have already made the first step.
Sounds like you were making yourself miserable in how you followed your goal... That's not how it's supposed to be! I believe working for our goals should be a liberating, enriching process.
Why did you stay at home? Why did you isolate yourself? Was it because you didn't trust yourself?
I very much identify with where you are right now, and have been going through it myself. It's strange, I come to this site, I read all the articles, participate in the forums, read about new clean recipes, and then I eat junk food, and don't exercise.
I have been considering starting a journal, confessing my sins, and to be accountable, but I haven't done it, partly out of shame.
I have felt this dark cloud you mention, and I have been struggling with it for almost all of 2009.
I'm sorry, I'm not trying to hijack your thread with my problems. I was just thinking, maybe we could support each other. Make a pact, form a bond, become spit sisters or something. (OK, maybe the last one was a bit much.)
I don't do New Years resolutions per se. Those are usually my formulas for failure. However, I am moving after the holidays, and, along with several other new starts, will be getting back on plan both with diet and training after the first of the year. I will be here to support you (along with all the other wonderful ladies here) and would love to have your support in return. Let's do it! Let's hit our goals in '10 without sacrificing our sanity.
Hey Trish...good to see you back! I have those same all or nothing struggles and I'm working so hard at finding that balance...I'll be here to support you along the way
Thank You Nic
Quote:
Originally Posted by LittleAsianDoll
Hi Trish!
You have already made the first step.
Sounds like you were making yourself miserable in how you followed your goal... That's not how it's supposed to be! I believe working for our goals should be a liberating, enriching process.
Why did you stay at home? Why did you isolate yourself? Was it because you didn't trust yourself?
I stayed home because I didn’t want to be tempted. I didn’t want to put myself in a position where the next day I was going to be feeling all guilty and depressed. It even affected my relationship with my bf because he loves to go out and have a drink and wings and I just didn’t. I took away the one thing we did when we first started. He loves the gym and works out very hard but he doesn’t stress about food like I do. Guess I really can’t explain it….. I didn’t even take a vacation because I didn’t want anyone to see me. I don’t want to do that kind of crap.
Quote:
Originally Posted by firespinner93
Hi Trish,
It's good to see you.
I very much identify with where you are right now, and have been going through it myself. It's strange, I come to this site, I read all the articles, participate in the forums, read about new clean recipes, and then I eat junk food, and don't exercise.
I have been considering starting a journal, confessing my sins, and to be accountable, but I haven't done it, partly out of shame.
I have felt this dark cloud you mention, and I have been struggling with it for almost all of 2009.
I'm sorry, I'm not trying to hijack your thread with my problems. I was just thinking, maybe we could support each other. Make a pact, form a bond, become spit sisters or something. (OK, maybe the last one was a bit much.)
I don't do New Years resolutions per se. Those are usually my formulas for failure. However, I am moving after the holidays, and, along with several other new starts, will be getting back on plan both with diet and training after the first of the year. I will be here to support you (along with all the other wonderful ladies here) and would love to have your support in return. Let's do it! Let's hit our goals in '10 without sacrificing our sanity.
Sincerely,
Michelle
Hi Michelle,
Your fine, you’re not hijacking anything. I figured I would start after the holidays too. I was going to start now but with all the parties, its like trying to break from something yet having it in your face every second. After the holidays people at work also slow down bringing things so it should be better and well I just refuse to keep buying bigger clothes.
I am also trying to take advantage to really think about it, and decide how I will do it this time that I don’t commit the same mistakes. I don’t know if I want to call them mistakes per say but more like lessons on what not to do. I sure will support you and can relate to every single thing you mention on your post.
Good for you on starting a journal! We will be here for you to support you on your journey. Have a think about what you want for 2010 and get an action plan ready so that you hit the ground running next year!
I stayed home because I didn’t want to be tempted. I didn’t want to put myself in a position where the next day I was going to be feeling all guilty and depressed. It even affected my relationship with my bf because he loves to go out and have a drink and wings and I just didn’t. I took away the one thing we did when we first started. He loves the gym and works out very hard but he doesn’t stress about food like I do. Guess I really can’t explain it….. I didn’t even take a vacation because I didn’t want anyone to see me. I don’t want to do that kind of crap.
Trish, Im glad you came back. Its one of the hardest things to do at least it was for me. Im starting over as well and honestly what I can tell you is one foot in front of the other.
I have the same all or nothing attitude and Im working to change it. I feel the same as you do that at times I feel isolated from everyone else. But we have to always remind our selves that this is a choice we make for ourselves. Sure we can eat anything we want but in the end is it worth it? I know for me I get so down on myself and Im sick of it, Im sick of beating myself up all time time so I decided the only way I can do this is by taking it one day, one meal at a time.
You can get back to where you were, I know you can. We are all here with you.
__________________ Rosie
The Following User Says Thank You to mermaid For This Useful Post:
Let's take a look at the positives . You've made the right decision by choosing to begin your journey again. Starting is always the hardest part, but you've done this before. After a week or two you will feel great again. We all fall off at some point in our lives. We are human. It happens. I have fallen off the wagon so many times, but I get up everytime.
I know you can find that balance you are searching for. It will come in time. Kudos to you for taking the first step. THIS IS HUGE!!! YAY!
__________________
*How many people you BLESS is how you measure success*
The Following User Says Thank You to Lynzbabe For This Useful Post:
I have been trying to sort my head out (seeing as it is the one controlling everything else). I was recommended a book by a fellow OL girlie in one of the threads...and it has really really helped. I haven't yet finished it...I am half way through. But it is amazing how it explains certain things and I can actually begin understanding myself and why I do what I do, when I do it and what I do and how it all links in. If you want to read it it's only available as an ebook: [url=http://www.scottabel.com/store/product.php?productid=16156]Abel Bodies Fitness*::*Books*::*EBooks*::*THE OTHER SIDE OF THE MIRROR[/url]
Keep searching for answers, and you will learn more and more about who you are.
I have been trying to sort my head out (seeing as it is the one controlling everything else). I was recommended a book by a fellow OL girlie in one of the threads...and it has really really helped. I haven't yet finished it...I am half way through. But it is amazing how it explains certain things and I can actually begin understanding myself and why I do what I do, when I do it and what I do and how it all links in. If you want to read it it's only available as an ebook: [url=http://www.scottabel.com/store/product.php?productid=16156]Abel Bodies Fitness*::*Books*::*EBooks*::*THE OTHER SIDE OF THE MIRROR[/url]
Keep searching for answers, and you will learn more and more about who you are.
And don't forget that we're here for support!
Thank you for the recommendation....can you say more about it, meaning what is it you like from it
Yes, I am not yet finished with the book, but in a nutshell it is teaching me why I binge (and even why I WANT to binge), it has explained why I am attracted to the sport of bodybuilding (figure), it puts into context why I have such a battle with myself about food, it explains the whole metabolic process which occurs following a contest diet and why there are rebounds in weight (it is not simply a question of eating more) and it also highlights the reasons why my brain works in the ways it works when I am preparing for a contest as well as following a contest.
It has really helped me, so far, to understand myself. I have struggled twice following shows and I feel that enough is enough. I don't want to keep on making the same mistakes. I feel like food (diet) has been taking over my life and I want it to stop. I want it to be less of an issue.
Anyway, I highly recommend it for helping understand yourself and your relationship with exercise and food.
Hope that you're getting on ok and here's to a happy, healthy and successful 2010!!
The Following User Says Thank You to R2D2 For This Useful Post:
Trish I thought I was the only one that had the dark clouds following me around while everyone else had sunshiney days! You are not alone! I am in the same boat. But lets make 2010 our year to shine shall we and I am guessing those dark clouds will disappear as well!
Trish I thought I was the only one that had the dark clouds following me around while everyone else had sunshiney days! You are not alone! I am in the same boat. But lets make 2010 our year to shine shall we and I am guessing those dark clouds will disappear as well!
Starting over
We will be here for you to support you on your journey. Have a think about what you want for 2010 and get an action plan ready so that you hit the ground running next year! 
. You've made the right decision by choosing to begin your journey again. Starting is always the hardest part, but you've done this before. After a week or two you will feel great again. We all fall off at some point in our lives. We are human. It happens. I have fallen off the wagon so many times, but I get up everytime.
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